Redefining Ambition: How Women Can Be Ambitious and Happy Without Burning Out

5 Apr

We were raised on the idea that women can—and should—have it all. A fulfilling career. A family. Inner peace. Glowing skin. It's empowering on the surface, but in reality, it’s left many women feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and wondering: Is this it?

As a life coach supporting high-achieving, professional women, I hear this tension daily. On the outside, they’re thriving. Inside, something feels out of alignment. The drive is still there—but the joy has gone missing.

So let’s ask a better question:
What if ambition isn’t the problem? What if it’s how we’ve been taught to define it?

What Do We Get Right—and Wrong—About Ambition in Women?

For perhaps the first time in history, female ambition is finally being recognised and celebrated. Women are no longer shamed for wanting more. That’s a huge cultural win.

But we’re still shaking off the outdated belief that ambition has to mean striving at all costs. That it’s about climbing someone else’s ladder, no matter how exhausted or disconnected you feel. Many women are starting to question that model—and rightly so.

I often ask my clients:

“What would make 2025 a successful year?”

Then I reframe it:

“What would make it a fulfilling year?”

For some, success is still about career growth. For others, it’s reclaiming rest, being more present with their family, or finally prioritising themselves. The ambition is still there—it’s just being redefined.

Can There Be Too Much Ambition?

Yes—when it’s not coming from the right place.

Healthy ambition is driven by purpose, passion, and joy. But many women I work with are powering themselves on anxiety, guilt, or imposter syndrome. It becomes another stick to beat themselves with.

Ambition should be the carrot, not the stick. It should pull you forward, not push you to the edge. So I always ask:
“What’s fuelling this ambition?”
If it’s rooted in fear or “shoulds,” it’s time to recalibrate.

Is Ambition a Trap?

Ambition becomes a trap when you’re chasing goals that were never yours to begin with. When you’re on a conveyor belt of expectations, climbing a ladder that someone else told you to value.

True ambition should feel like alignment, not obligation. It should be self-defined, not society-imposed.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re stuck on a treadmill you never chose, it’s time to step off, take stock, and ask:
“What do I want?”
That’s not selfish. That’s sovereignty.

How to Balance Ambition and Contentment

A lot of women struggle with the idea that you can be ambitious and content. But here’s the truth:
You can be grateful for your life and still want more.
You can feel fulfilled and still be growing.

Ambition pulls you forward. Contentment grounds you. You need both.

The danger is when ambition tells you that resting is failure. That if you’re not striving, you’re falling behind. In fact, contentment is what gives you the capacity to keep striving—without burning out.

Why Ambition Feels Different Across Generations

Most of the women I coach are millennials, and we were handed a story:
“You can do it all.”
But that story has often translated into simply doing more. And many millennial women are burnt out.

The good news? There’s a quiet revolution happening. Women are waking up. They’re questioning, rewriting, redefining. They’re choosing a different path—one built on self-trust, aligned values, and genuine wellbeing.

And while Gen Z may be more native to these ideas (thanks to a growing focus on mental health), this shift isn’t age-bound. I’ve worked with women in their 50s doing the exact same transformational work. The ambition is still there—but it’s on their terms now.

How to Reach Your Goals and Be Happy With “Enough”

The most powerful way to stay ambitious and fulfilled is to build a strong foundation of wellbeing. There’s a beautiful psychological framework called PERMA (which you can read more about here), which includes:

Positive Emotion – moments of joy, calm, and gratitude
Engagement – being absorbed in something meaningful
Relationships – authentic connection with others
Meaning – a sense of purpose
Achievement – setting and reaching goals

Notice that achievement is just one part of a full life—not the only one.

Daily practices like gratitude, presence, and journaling don’t just “feel nice”—they build resilience. They allow your ambition to thrive, without tipping into depletion. These moments of simplicity can become your most powerful tools for change.

Final Thoughts: Your Ambition, Your Rules

Ambition isn’t the enemy. The outdated definition of ambition is.

You are allowed to want more and be at peace with what you already have. You are allowed to rest and still be driven. You are allowed to rewrite your own version of success.

So if you’re feeling stretched thin, pulled in a thousand directions, or questioning the path you’re on—it’s okay to pause. To take stock. To choose again.

Your ambition is still valid. Just make sure it’s yours.

Ready to redefine ambition on your terms?

If you're craving clarity, direction, and space to come back to yourself, my coaching supports women just like you to reconnect with their purpose, rebuild their resilience, and live with intention. Click here to find out more about my coaching.
Or listen to my podcast, The Overwhelm Edit, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts for tools and stories to reset your energy and take back control